Water is the weakest element in my chart. Its sensitive, receptive and intuitive qualities are something that I am constantly working on; it never comes naturally. There are benefits to being weak in water to be sure and I’ve had many people tell me they’re admirable. But as with many things in life, the degree of your strength can indicate the degree of your weakness and vice versa. I used to think very emotional people were kind of lame. Especially with my Sag planets, a sign that is notorious for its insensitivity. Just get over it! Lighten up!

So I’m dedicating three posts to the water signs. Like many people, what I don’t have naturally in my chart, I instinctively seek from my environment. I hang with a lot of watery people and this series is about what I’ve learned from them. So it’s 100% applied astrology. It’s not about the water signs in and of themselves, but their expression in people. I’ll begin with Scorpio as the sun is currently transiting the sign.

Scorpio, by Abi Heyneke via Society6.com


Scorpio has a nasty reputation, arguably one of the worst of the zodiac. I’ll fess up and admit that my only water placements are in this sign. Yet there was a lot about Scorpio I didn’t relate to. I found the brooding and darkness unnecessary. The obsessiveness too narrowly focused. The mind and power games a waste of time, especially any notions of revenge or fucking around with people. The heartbroken, vengeful Scorpio always defied my understanding. My energy conserving Capricorn and carefree Sagittarius planets would kick in and I’d think, there are so many better things one could do with one’s time/energy than exact vengeance. I’d rather leave things up to “karma” (by which, I DON’T mean poetic justice or expecting bad things will happen to bad people. I mean the punishment for shitty behaviour is that one’s very being eventually becomes shitty).

But the closest people in my life have significant Scorpio placements. My sister, a Scorpio stellium. My partner, a Scorp ASC conjunct Pluto. One of my closest girlfriends and my only close male friend are also Scorpionic. So I’ve had a lot of time to observe Scorpio’s strengths up close.

First, the LOYALTY. Loyalty takes different forms, but for Scorpio that means going through hell for you, it means being willing to crawl through shit and broken glass on their knees for you without a second thought or without thinking they’re being melodramatic. It will take a lot of effort for you to gain the loyalty of a Scorpio, but once attained, it is fixed, concentrated and intense. You will never find a more devoted or committed friend or lover. It’s probably why the people closest to me are Scorpionic even if they aren’t the most fun or exciting people in my social network.

Secondly, the inability to let go of conflict and betrayal has its benefits. Unlike me, who simply forgives and walks away, those who keep themselves in those types of situations learn how to navigate in them. Scorpios are great STRATEGISTS. They have a natural talent for it to begin with: a unique ability to focus and obsess that non-Scorp planets don’t have. But those who have spent considerable amounts of time in certain situations have also honed their self preservation instincts into STRATEGY. There’s a militaristic aspect to it, and never forget that Scorps are ruled by Mars. I often turn to my Scorpio peeps for advice about how to handle other people. Despite my love for psychology, I am simply too laissez faire when it comes to emotions and human interaction. Sometimes I wish my Scorp planets gave me more ability in this area because strategy doesn’t mean just getting what you want or screwing with people. It also means the ability to motivate and empower people, to get a group to gel as a team, etc.

Finally, it’s obvious but the world needs the emotional DEPTH and focus Scorpio people bring. I just loved our recent new moon in Scorpio which hit off some important points in my chart; I had so many heartfelt conversations about difficult topics and shared things normally left unsaid. If you don’t have this in your life, your life can lack a certain emotional dimension. Emotional exchanges like this nourish your being.

John Tibbott via society6.com


People who have strong Scorpio signatures take trust and loyalty very seriously. Even if they are flippant on the surface, they are still probing. For most people there is a kind of passive, organic way in which trust is naturally assumed at first and then it deepens incrementally over time. For Scorpio, it doesn’t work like that. Either s/he’s in or out. You might ask, why does it have to be so black and white? But I kind of get this. I don’t consider anyone a “true friend” unless 1) we have resolved a serious personal conflict together and 2) s/he has pulled through for me in a time of difficulty. I think we all can think like this to a degree. Now the difference is that while most of us are content to go years without a friendship reaching the “true” level, Scorpio’s just not as interested. They don’t trust in increments the way other people can. They’re not going to open up and make themselves completely vulnerable.

So this extremity makes Scorpios more prone to things like hurting you to see if you’ll stick around, snooping on you or all kinds of destructive bullshit. Some can even become detached enough to make a game of it with the mentality that they play to win. I’m not saying other signs don’t do this, but Scorpios are more inclined. To avoid this as much as possible, you need to go out of your way and invest some extra effort with your Scorpio to make sure s/he understands that you are just as committed as s/he is. You need to prove yourself with actions and realize that expectations may be very high. You also need to decide how much of this testing you are willing to tolerate and realize that there are some Scorpios who won’t trust you no matter what you do. Remember that for a Scorpio, the motivation is a matter of self preservation because it’s that serious. Never take their terror of being hurt, humiliated or heartbroken lightly.

You might be asking yourself, this sounds like a lot of work so why should I bother? Let me tell you about how one of my closest friendships began. He has some Scorpio planets aspecting sun and moon, Pluto opposite sun. First, he was prickly to strangers and didn’t bother with small talk – test #1. Then he didn’t return my calls – test #2. Unsurprizingly, this man doesn’t have many friends. I had to call over and over, leaving messages for about a goddamn month. I wouldn’t normally put this kind of effort into someone who attracts me romantically, nevermind someone I just want to be friends with. But I just knew he needed the extra assurance that I was serious about being friends. Years later, when I was going through a rough patch, he was the only one who I felt accepted the depth of my grief. He saw me at my absolute worst, and never judged me for it. Seems like a lot to gain considering all I had to do was leave a bunch of voicemail messages, if you ask me.

Up next: Pisces as formidable leaders. I’m not kidding!